Was this rude of me? Boyfriend's mom?

I cooked for my boyfriend's mom at her house (because I live 30 minutes away) and then was washing the dishes to clean up. I wash the dishes by putting soap on the rag and wiping them down and running them under water. She said something like "you're going to do it THAT way?" and I said yeah this is the way I do it. Then I found out that she was talking to her daughter about how I should have put them in a sink full of soapy water. My boyfriend told her that she was being absolutely ridiculous and she said "Well she could have atleast asked how I preferred her to do the dishes!" Do you think that it was rude of me? Also.. I got so outdone with it (among other things that she has complained about) that I told her that I no longer felt welcomed at her home and would no longer be going over there because I might not wash a dish in the proper manner. Was this rude? I felt like I was being disrespected and needed to take up for myself. How do you respect an elder when they are totally running all over you?